Life Is Not About Living

Being a human, I thought a lot, in emotions- judge a lot and in judgments -I get emotions lot,

The life what everybody says, even mine also running in bad in good mood, in even in odd routes, but little drier than water in eyes, ignorance’s lot in mind than actually in life.

What I think from my childhood, life is like running behind to save yourself, make happy or try to be happy yourself by any means of approach by ego by being rude or by mislead self or mislead else. But the feel-good factor still ignored,

Life what we say in words was like an experience, what we lived, but mine was bad in every aspect,

I am running from myself every time like I am running behind my own shadow and feel it is like this race will be living along.

And I know or get known something in my own self is not actually right, but it’s very much sensitive to touch this aspect of my own life.

So, I take some patience breath and leading life like daily getting defeat by self or others this was not questionable as I learned, others are responsible.

Getting from one place to other places to find peace and some people nice.

Then intellect grew up and a fool blew by this own mind.

Places are not problem, may be but not that lot of, maybe but still some peace can be in self when you are alone.

Then this fool tries many tools then actually intellect does play his play in full perform.

Life what I was, or I am not finding a way to express self, and by what self is trying to express not grown up, it’s like two-part was apart, one intellect tries to repair the emotions and life getting exist.

It's like a surgeon knife try to repair the open skin but every time make more wound then stitches. That’s how intellect repairs emotions and make life existed for certain 34 years.

Then at the point of exaction life get to stand up, the demand for a real cause, and just shut the system on hold to live only for a day at any cost.

This seizes work and war get seize fire of intellect and emotions, what arises there is, called awareness.

The blockage of mind gets cleared, the mistake in wrong knowledge, what the intellect gets a glimpse of truth, just not by self but the contradiction of other people approaches toward an ingrown.

Just default for life, to hold on the ingrown conceptual mind, the ingrown emotional self, ingrown ego self, 

So also, with, others approach.

And still human says they well known to emotions and God.

Prayer and patience and the proper approach.

They know the mind and they know the heart,

That’s y they not hurt but more broke the broken and more generous the already filled.

The same way all the world works together to make it pity to clear that self-sixty.

What I do, that was mine, and till that time I was thinking that is me but was wrong, not my approach, but what put on me, I just wore,

Then on what should believe, if my self was wrong, yes, I can build myself again but can be that also wrong, then what the real approach,

I take a book , read how the mind works on , what the emotions are actually,

What the intellect is the things,

What life is it,

What the truth is there,

What practicality has happening,

Who is in ignores,

What did I do wrong?

What were my karmic sins?

Who created these sevens?

If really god exists.

Its honesty pays off its debits or credits.

Who I am,

Why I am,

What existences is mine

Who playing the game,

What is human is,

What means this life,

I find thoughts

I find memory

And I find a lot

I find mind,

I find intellect,

I find reality

I find life,

Life is us the manifestation efforts, from a billion through god through nature, the human is liberal, but the self is unknown that is the real cause of all misery,

Still, for the mind there is rule otherwise it gets muddy in thoughts and we get our senses lost.

Mind get automated in approach and we merge in it like an intellect less robot. We are just experiencer and mind is the machine to create experiences.

By means of knowledge.