Searching Eternally

I am so incredibly lonely. I feel that people are not meant to be solo with such short lasting attachments for this long. I feel at 25, one should already be building upon a relationship that is already a few years old. 

It doesn’t matter what I feel. The utter truth is that I will not be with someone unmatched with myself. My “one” has so many qualifications that he probably does not exist...but at the same time...I feel my expectations are rational and only require one thing in particular. I must be irrationally in love with them, their mind, their personality, their heart. I must also be in lust with them. Most notably, I think my issue is connection. I don’t feel connected with many people in this world. It doesn’t make sense how there can be so many, especially with today’s technologies, but still, I don’t feel connected. 

It’s like in a previous lifetime, I was so connected with my partner, that everything else pales in comparison. “Whatever souls are made of, we are made of the same.” No one gets my humor. Perhaps I should try moving to The UK where my personality fits, merely based on movies and shows I have watched. 

Maybe it’s that I want someone brilliant, but I am not brilliant, so those individuals will not be attracted to me. I just simply want to be able to contemplate life and debate intelligently, light heartedly with. I want to be challenged and provoked by someone who is not only educated, but witty and curious. 

So my search continues..possibly for an eternity.