Thinking Out Loud

Thinking out loud,

The thoughts that often gets my brain to cloud.

Thinking out loud,

The words my mouth couldn't spout,

The words I wish I could say,

But in the maze of my mind, lifeless they still lay.

Thinking out loud,

At the topmost pitch of my voice, I want to shout.

Shout and shout,

Till blood from my heart and throat, starts gushing out .

But something's stopping me,

The fear of getting judged laying its weight upon me.

Thus the loudest of thoughts barely leading to any action,

Other than pushing me into the unfathomable ocean of depression.

As the intensity of my thoughts grew,

So did my habit of introversion,

From masked people and their fake society, I withdrew.

Even at this moment I'm thinking out loud,

But I've decided to disguise myself amidst the passing crowd

As my actions slowing down, voice turning feeble

The thoughts inside my head, still do mumble.

Stuck I'm in this vicious cycle of "What if" and "if nots"

Running to seek solace from the devil of my own thoughts.