butistronglyfeelgodshowedme don't want to handle anymore idontknowwhatiam peoplewholoveame mylifesoineedto because it's hurtingtoomuch buticantlietomyself nevereverthoughtthis scaredtoacceptthings toomuchiwrite infuturenow scaredofphysicalviolence difficult to understand don't know what to do whatisrightorwrong doingiscorrectorwrong ialreadyhadlotnow iwasalwaytruetomyselfinall truth nowscaredtofaceit