A “Don Juan” On The Train

“Wake up guys! The Sun is up!” Ryan yelled, pulling the curtains aside from the hostel room window, and continued in the same pitch, “We have a train to catch!”

As the bright natural light instantly lit up the otherwise dark room, he scanned it to assess any permanent damages from the previous night's party. There wasn't much, except the fact that the room looked like a giant trash can – leftover food, disposable cups and plates, tissue papers scattered all around.

"Phew," he whistled softly, and murmured, "that can be fixed."

Ryan was the male vocalist and keyboardist of this college rock band of four. They were on a tour to Europe to attend the Download Rock Festival. And previous night being the final night of their tour, they decided to enjoy it to the fullest at their room with other hostellers. Playing Deez Nuts’ song "Party Like There's No Tomorrow" on repeat, apparently everyone took it too seriously and they ended up partying till dawn. Everyone, except Ryan, who ensured that there is a tomorrow, and it goes as planned.

He was now standing with his back to the window and his hands on his hips, thinking from whom to begin shaking and waking up, when the trash can begin to show signs of life. Chatty, who had passed out on the couch, was the first one to awake as he sat up rubbing his eyes. He was their drummer, lyricist, and also an introvert, whose meaningful lyrics made up for his otherwise silent nature.

Little relieved, Ryan shifted his gaze to the only female member of their band and called out - "Layla!"

She was their female vocalist and bassist, and was the only party animal from previous night who honored one of the bunk beds. Like an ostrich with its head buried in the sand, keeping her head still under the pillows she stuck out her right hand and made a five with her palm.

"That's what you said fifteen minutes back," Ryan retorted, "Now no more five minutes."

She sat up with a jerk, her eyes still closed, and said in a subdued voice, "Alright."

As she slowly opened her eyes, looked around and sobered up, she noticed Chatty with his toothbrush in his mouth and towel on his shoulder heading to the only bathroom in the room.

"Hey! Ladies first!" she yelled, raising her hand to stop him.

He paused at the bathroom door, pulled the toothbrush out of his mouth and replied, "You snooze, you lose."

"Argh!" Layla squawked and threw one of her two pillows at him. But he made a dash for the bathroom and the pillow hit its now closed door.

Ryan shook his head, and shifted his attention to the worst of them all - Stud!

He was their lead guitarist, and the only person in the group who believed that being a lead guitarist qualified him as the coolest guy in the band. This overconfidence of his often landed him in trouble. In last night's party too, he was the center of attraction.

He was sound asleep on the floor in the center of the room, oblivious to the events happening around him. Ryan shook his head again in disappointment, and decided to give him a personal treatment.

He squatted down next to Stud, gently placed his hands on his shoulders, and then suddenly began shaking him vigorously and shouting, "Wake up. Wake up. Wake up," until he opened his eyes.

Stud propped himself up on his elbows, looked around nonchalantly, and asked, "Where is the fire man?"

"Nowhere yet. But I will start one, and you know very well where, if in one hour we all are not ready and this room is not clean," Ryan almost threatened him.

“Why can’t we leave the room as it is?” Layla asked.

“No!” he answered firmly. “Till date we haven’t done anything on this foreign land that gives a bad name to our country. And I won’t let that happen on our last day either.”

Stud, looking impervious to the threat, kept looking around, as if searching for something.

"Aha! Then let me start the cleaning with this," he blurted out while picking a leftover pizza slice from a disposable plate lying near him.

"What do you think you are doing?" Ryan asked him, surprised.

"I am fulfilling my dreams."

"How so?"

"Well you see, I was dreaming of eating this pizza slice last night. And today I am eating it," Stud took a bite and shrugged, "fulfilling my dreams."

Layla threw her remaining pillow at Stud, and intervened, "Last night? Do you even remember anything about last night?"

"Bits and pieces." Stud replied without taking his eyes off the slice.

Layla turned to Ryan, and pointing her finger in Stud's direction, complained "He hit on every girl in the party last night, including me!"

Before Stud could say anything, she turned to him and continued, "And the worst part is you kept calling me by some other name!" She looked around on the bed, and grabbed a blanket to throw at him.

"Me? I hit on you?" Stud asked with an astonished look on his face. "First of all, I am not going through such a bad time...," the blanket hit him in the face before he could finish. He pulled the blanket down, and continued with a smirk on his face, "And even if I did, you should think yourself lucky."

Layla threw her hands up in the air, shrugged her shoulders and shook her head, confused.

Stud took another big bite of his pizza, and continued with the same smirk, "You see, all the girls in my apartment building are crazy for me. They would die just to catch a glimpse of me."

Layla began to reply, "And doesn't it bother you...," but then she paused as Stud began to nod proudly, and finished her comeback, "...to live in a building full of girls with poor eyesight?"

As Stud’s proud smile turned into a grumpy frown, she snickered.

CLAP! CLAP! CLAP!

Everyone’s attention got diverted to the bathroom door, where Chatty was giving Layla a slow clap with a nod. She took a bow in response.

To put an end to the argument, Ryan snapped while tapping on his wrist watch, "Ok guys, enough. Time's a-wasting, time's a-wasting."

One hour later, the group hurried out of the hostel after cleaning the room to reach the station, just in time to board their train. As usual, Chatty secured a window seat and fixed his attention to the outside world. Layla took the one opposite him. And Stud sat next to Chatty. As he began to put his headset on and Layla began opening a novel, Ryan gestured both of them to stop, and said, "Guys, remember, I want all of us to be on the best of our behavior."

He looked at Layla first for a response. She gave him a thumb up, answered with a sarcastic smile, "Ok dad," and buried her face in her novel.

Then he turned to Stud. He looked distracted, staring in the direction of the door.

"Stud!" Ryan said loudly, to get his attention.

"Yeah, whatever you say man," he replied without moving his eyes. And then pointing in that direction, added, "Just look at her."

Layla lowered her novel, and she and Ryan followed Stud’s gaze to find a very beautiful girl entering the compartment. She was holding a tiny, white Pomeranian puppy in one hand, and was struggling to drag her bag with the other. By the time the two friends turned to Stud, he had already kept the headset aside, removed his jacket, and was now putting his sunglasses on. The caption written on his t shirt read –

"DON JUAN", and under it, "At Your Service".

He muttered, "Damsel in distress, here I come," and left.

"Who is Don Juan?" Layla.

It was Chatty who answered that without shifting his gaze from the window, "Don Juan is a fictional character, a womanizer, and one of the greatest seducers ever written in fiction. The term is ever since used synonymously for a playboy.”

Layla lifted her novel to her face and mumbled teasingly, "So much for being on the best of our behavior."

Ryan heard that, and plopped down in the seat next to her, feeling in his bones that something terrible is going to happen. The train had begun to move.

“So these are my friends I was telling you about,” Stud’s words got Ryan’s attention as he returned with that girl, and was now keeping her bag under the seat next to their luggage. She smiled at the group. Stud gestured her to sit, and took the seat opposite her.

“Guys, this is Sophie,” he began the introductions, “and this cute little guy in her lap is Snow,” he said pointing at the pup in Sophie’s lap.

“Hii Sophiee,” Ryan and Layla sang in unison.

“Hi you all,” Sophie said with the same smile, and waved.

Layla remarked, “Finally I will have a female company. Else I was feeling like an odd man out.”

“You mean an odd woman out?” Sophie quipped, and they burst into laughter.

Stud turned to Chatty, who was still absorbed in the views outside the window. He shook his shoulder to get his attention, and introduced him, “And this is Chatty.”

Chatty smiled politely, and waved at Sophie. She waved back, and Chatty quickly turned his attention back to the window.

Puzzled, but still maintaining her smile, Sophie joked, “Chatty! An interesting nickname for such a silent person.”

Layla grabbed this opportunity and blurted out, pointing in Stud’s direction, “You see, this is exactly why we call him Stud.”

He gave her a black look, which she returned by sticking her tongue out.

Very soon, Sophie had warmed up to the group. However, Stud still hadn’t been able to create an intimacy with her. But as they say – desperate times call for desperate measures. So in order to get her special attention, he did something that he had been steering clear of. He began befriending Snow, talking to him softly, petting him, and scratching his neck.

Ryan and Layla looked at each other in astonishment as he did that, and it even got Chatty’s attention momentarily. They all knew that Stud not only disliked dogs, but was scared of them too.

“Aw, see Snow loves you,” Sophie cooed.

“Oh dogs love me. In fact all the dogs in my apartment building go crazy on just catching a glimpse of me,” he replied, then looked briefly at Layla. She was staring at him with her jaw dropped, shocked at his lying skills. He winked at her as she mouthed – “LIAR.”

“Aw! Do you want to hold him?” Sophie asked, lifting Snow in front of his face.

Ryan and Layla exchanged looks again.

“Uh,” Stud hesitated for a second. But realizing that this could be a stepping stone, he agreed with a nervous smile, “Why not?”

Next moment, Snow was sitting in Stud’s lap. Stud was sitting frozen, as if Snow was a bomb that would go off on any sudden movement. The only relief was seeing that Sophie was now actually paying more attention to him. She was probably getting interested in him too. Ryan was now only an occasional participant in the conversation, and Layla was back to reading her novel.

Stud now had this smug on his face, which was getting prouder and prouder with every moment, and with every word coming out of Sophie’s mouth. But Sophie’s station was approaching. And he was still thinking of how to get her contact details.

“I’m glad to see how much Snow likes you,” Sophie said to him.

“And what about you?” he asked with a naughty look in his eyes.

Sophie lowered her eyes and answered with a shy smile, “The two qualities I admire the most in a guy are – love for dogs and genuineness. So you are almost there.”

Stud jumped at it, “In that case if I have to tell you more about myself, how about sharing your contact details?”

Sophie took out a pen and a notepad from her handbag, wrote down her details on a page, and handed it over to Stud. As she was returning the bag’s items, something struck her. She pulled out a pack of biscuits from it, and held it in front of him.

He pulled a biscuit out and waited for her to offer it to the others too – which, to his surprise (and delight), she didn’t.

“They are non-existent to her. She is interested only in me,” he thought, and happily began to take a bite from the biscuit.

That’s when everybody’s expressions began to change, as if in slow motion–

As he began to take the biscuit towards his mouth, Sophie's eyes began to widen, Ryan began lifting his hands, gesturing him to stop and almost screaming "Dude…”, Layla began lowering her novel, and Snows eyes, glued to the biscuit, began following it in anticipation.

As the biscuit neared Stud’s mouth, Ryan continued gesturing him to stop and screaming, “…what are you…”, Layla and Sophie continued watching in disbelief, and Snow’s anticipation turned into disappointment.

Before he could be stopped, Stud took a big bite from the biscuit, and Ryan’s scream turned into an undertone as he lowered his hands, and finished his sentence, “…doing?”

Layla waited for some time, and then placed her hand on her mouth to hide her laugh.

Chatty, as if woken up to this hullaballoo from a sleep, turned his attention from the window to the compartment. He first looked at Stud's face who was now chewing the biscuit, then looked at his hand still holding the remaining half of the biscuit, and then looked at the packet in Sophie's hand, which read – "DOG BISCUIT".

It was funny to see that in this state of happiness, mixed with pride, Stud didn't at all look troubled by the biscuit's weird taste. Everyone else was disgusted. And Snow was the unhappiest of them all.

Sophie was the first one to react.

She took out another biscuit, and fed it to Snow. She snatched the paper from Stud’s hand, and almost snatched Snow from his lap as she mumbled, “A dog lover and a genuine guy.” She then stood up, smiled politely at everyone except Stud, and excused herself saying, "Nice meeting you all."

They replied with a dull, embarrassed “Bye” as she left without even looking at Stud.

When she was gone, the romantic bubble around him burst, he woke up to reality, and realized the weird taste in his mouth.

Ryan gave a gentle tap on his head and asked, "Yeah, now you find the taste weird?"

Layla, who had been holding it in so far, burst into laughter, and somehow managed to ask, "Do you also eat the dog-food of all the dogs in your apartment building?"

Chatty quietly took a highlighter from Layla’s hand, crossed "Juan" on Stud's t shirt, replaced it with "key", and shifted his attention back to the window.

 

Stud looked down at his t shirt which now read, “Donkey At Your Service”, and expressed his disappointment, saying, “She could have at least shared her phone number.”