Living In

Sudha was very happy that day. Finally, she was having her way, and more than anything this made her happy. She was childlike, in many ways, always wanting her words or wish to prevail, both at home with her parents and with her friends.

She had succeeded in convincing her boyfriend of three years, who was also her colleague, to live together before marriage. There was no specific reason why she wanted to be in a live-in relationship with Raghu, her partner when he was ready to get married to her. But she always wanted to do things differently and what she perceived as “in thing”, as she had seen few of her friends enter into living in relationships. Her parents did not object as they always supported her, in whatever she did and expected her to face the consequences.

Sudha and Raghu rented an apartment and moved into it. They made it up tastefully and had a grand get-together, mostly with their friends and colleagues, soon after they moved into it. Many wished them well, while few were jealous and one of Sudha’s friends Rama asked her,” Sudha I am still unable to understand the purpose behind this decision of yours. Raghu was ready for the marriage and these days if the marriage does not work out, one can always walk out of troubled marriage. You would be doing the same in a live-in relationship also. The only thing is it would not have any legalities involved. A break up after marriage or without marriage is going to be equally traumatic.”

Raghu and Sudha were happy in their own small world. They both would share their work at home and go together to the office and come back together. Sometimes they went on a short trip for holidays and long weekends. Raghu was career oriented and careful with expenditure, while Sudha was carefree and generous in spending, or rather she was a spendthrift. She would spend her money on all their travel and did not have any savings. She never insisted that Raghu should share the expenses. Raghu was particular that he shared the day-to-day expenses. Raghu tried to tell Sudha that she needed discipline in managing her finance but she brushed aside his advice and he did not insist as this may be infringing on her freedom.

It was more than two years now since they started living together. Sudha realized that she had absolutely no savings and on top of it she had dues on her credit cards and small loans. "Raghu can you please pay my credit card bills? I am running short of funds.” She had a shock of her life when he flatly refused, and said,” sorry but I don’t have any extra money left.” It turned out that he was saving a lot of money in way of FDs and SIP and also had paid a down payment for a flat.” Don’t you think you should involve me in the purchase of a flat and share the decision?” asked Sudha, while feeling hurt. “Well, we are only living together, sharing this apartment. You may have forgotten but I took you and showed these apartments a few months ago and you said you were not interested in investing in them. I liked them and decided to buy one. Why do I have to involve you in my personal investments? “ He was technically not wrong because they were not married to jointly own the property.

 He also refused to consider marriage at this point in time.” I don’t know why you insisted on this arrangement between us, but I think it worked out well for me. I had the opportunity to observe you closely and have seen how careless you are with money. You have no purpose or planning for both your finances and life as such. I have to help my parents to get my sister married. It would be impossible for me to share my future with you.” Saying so, he expressed his decision to move out.

Sudha was in shock. She was totally unprepared for this and also realized that she could not complain to anyone or initiate any action against Raghu. He made it clear that she was only a living partner and not his life partner. She was responsible for her position today and had to suffer the pain. The poor girl realized that the pain whether it was due to a broken marriage, or a broken relationship was the same and only time will heal her wounds.