Love Is Always Mutual

‘Oh my God!’ Rajesh screamed and literally stood on the brake pedal while moving the steering towards the right. In a jerk, I was almost thrown outside the windscreen of the car but for the seat belts. The phone in which I was indulging till that time dashed in the front board and I also started screaming ‘what the hell happened’ as I realized that something hit to the left mudguard of the car.

The car finally rode over the foot-path of the bridge and nothing was visible except the railing to which the headlights were focused.

‘The girl suddenly jumped to the fore of the car’. Rajesh who was driving murmured.

I was quick to release the seat belts and come out of the car. I saw a girl was down on the road and groaning. I assessed that the girl was just hit mildly on the left side of the car front but she wasn’t run over by the car wheels. By the time Rajesh also came out of the car. I looked at both ends of the 1 KM long bridge over river Kathjodi and not a soul was visible. It was about 1 AM in the night and this particular bridge was always rarely used by commuters in this particular time. We were returning from Bhubaneswar after attending a late-night meeting.

Somehow the girl who was aged about some 20-22 years got up. Frankly, she had some minor injuries in her head and maybe in her body also. But she didn't seem to be panicked. She stared at us in a strange look although the pain was visible.

‘Do you want to die?’ Rajesh asked a bit agitated.

‘Yes!’ The girl responded.

‘You should have jumped off the bridge, why are you jumping in front of my car?’ Rajesh murmured but clearly audible to me and the girl.

‘I know swimming,’ the girl answered perhaps sarcastically, ‘Anyway I am sorry if there are any damages to your vehicle. I am not in a condition to compensate for your loss. Just pardon me and forget me.’

She then started walking or say limping towards Bhubaneswar end. Both I and Rajesh stood jaw-dropped with such an extra-ordinary response of the girl.

Rajesh got into the car and reversed a bit so as to put the car on the carriage-way. He then hinted me to get into the car. I was in a dilemma. Definitely the girl is in a suicidal mood. Should we leave her here?

Rajesh perhaps understood my dilemma. He said, ‘There are PCR vans around a couple of kilometers after the bridge. Let’s inform them and they will take care.’

I wasn’t convinced. What if she really jumps off the bridge? She might be a swimmer but in the mid of rainy season when the river is flowing full, I don’t think any swimmer could deal with such swirling currents.

I found my mobile and discovered the fact that there’s no signal in this part of Bridge. I saw the direction of the girl and could see that she’s limping ahead. I did hesitate a bit but then decided to go after her.

Rajesh was really angry as he doesn’t want to be a party to such a thing although the damages to the body of the car are there. But he never liked any litigation that involves Police.

‘Find a PCR and send here’, I literally instructed Rajesh and quickly moved ahead towards the direction of the girl who was no more visible to me. I wasn’t able to see Rajesh’s reaction although I could guess his irritation as he didn’t move the car ahead.

After some 100 meters, I saw the girl was sitting on the footpath. Her face was inside her knees and perhaps crying too. I reached slowly near her.

‘What’s your issue?’ I asked.

She didn’t say anything. That means she was aware that I walked to her and that’s encouraging.

‘I know you want to die’, I said very calmly,’ You have your rights on your life. I am nobody to interfere. But then you are like my daughter. Thus, I think if you can share your pains to me before you decide to leave this world, at least you won’t have a complaint about the point that none has heard your problem.’

She didn’t respond, but her sobbing was audible to me. I looked towards our car and was really disappointed to see that Rajesh hadn’t moved a bit. How long I can stop this girl from committing suicide? The Police should be here as soon as possible to take the situation into their control.

I sat down at the footpath near the girl. Then I asked, ‘What would you think of your parents? What would be their condition after you die?'

She didn’t answer again but started crying more loudly. I waited. Sometimes crying out loud helps to release stresses.

After some minutes I again started talking, ‘I know your parents must be loving you very much. I always loved my children. So, your parents would be no different. Love is the only thing that makes people connected.’

She raised her face and stared at me. Her eyes were swollen and red. Tears were flowing down. She then said slowly but firmly, ‘Love is ruthless... You really don’t know what love is!’

I didn’t answer immediately although I understood this is a teen-age love-story issue. 

‘I loved him, gave my heart. I still love him. But what’s the end result? He just dumped me?’ Her tone although soft was rebellious in nature.

I smiled as my guess was right. But the girl perhaps didn’t take my smile positively.

‘I know people like you laugh at me.’ She said irritatingly.

I stopped smiling immediately realizing the undue effect on her. But I decided to do an argument on love with her so as to get some time more. I was really worried because Rajesh still had not moved ahead and the delay could be fatal.

‘I didn’t laugh at you.’ I said confidently, ‘I smiled because you aren’t aware of the true definition of love,’

She stared back at me with a question through her expression.

‘See, love is defined in two ways.’ I started literally lecturing, ‘The true love is caring and respecting each other’s emotion’.

‘I do care for him and respect his emotions!’ She interjected immediately. ‘That’s why I am here to sacrifice myself after he dumped me. I am ready to die if he is happy without me’.

‘No, that’s not love,’ I said bit firmly. ‘It’s your ego’.

‘Is it ego?’ She asked surprisingly. ‘He too loved me heartily earlier?’

‘That’s lust’, I responded confidently,’ Love is always mutual and eternal’. Your parents love you means they care for you and they are ready to do anything for you. You too are also mutually loving them in the sense that you respect them, care for them and ready to do anything for them. The same true love is there among siblings as well as friends.’

She remained silent for some moment, then raised her face again to ask, to which I stopped her waving my hand as I knew what she would ask me.

‘I know you want to ask what’s love between two young people, a boy and a girl’. I continued, ‘You people think this is akin to the filmy love story. But actually 90% of so-called false love is just driven by lust.’

‘No, my love wasn’t lust-driven.’ She rebutted me, ‘I loved him truly.’

‘As I told you earlier, that love is always mutual.’ I replied, ‘In this case, you tried to love that guy truly but the guy perhaps was reciprocating for a lust-driven love. That’s why this didn’t shape into a true love story!’

She couldn’t answer immediately. She really took some time to understand my point. I was really happy that she was recovering out of her own circle of ego.

‘Where’s my mistake? She asked again,’ I gave him true love, he betrayed and then you think I have an ego?’

‘There’s no mistake of yours in trying to truly love him,’ I responded,’ The only mistake of you is when you know that the love is not mutual between you and him, you still tried to have the love story go on.’

‘What would have been my response to a betrayal of my love?’ She asked as if she wanted to learn or try to realize where she did wrong.

‘Simple!’ I said smilingly, ‘The moment you realize that your effort of love is not reciprocated, you should know that the guy is unfit to get your love. Dump him and go ahead!’

‘But he dumped me,’ She said softly.

‘No, that’s wrong to say’ I replied, ‘He dumped means, he proved himself as unworthy to your love. You should be happy that you detected an unworthy guy early in your efforts of love.'

‘Why did you say that I am driven by ego?’ She asked me.

‘Well, your ego is that, if somebody doesn’t love me back, then I will end life’. I said in a confident tone. ‘This ‘I’ is dangerous. It’s your ego that blinded you of true love of your parents, siblings and good friends and came to end your life.’

She didn’t say anything.

‘Hey, girl!’ I said philosophically, ‘Life is beautiful and pretty long. It’s only the ego which shortens such a long life. People are committing suicide for poor marks in exams, betrayals in love affairs and many such petty issues just out of ego. I failed in the exam, I was dumped, I was victimized and so on… This is called life and life struggle. Failures are the lessons we need to learn and move ahead. But very fewer people realize it. I again say that ‘Life is beautiful and pretty long. It can’t be wasted through egotistic feelings.’

The girl remained silent perhaps trying to digest my loaded philosophical lecture.

‘Did you ever love in your college life?’ She asked.

I smiled and then replied. ‘Well, I too passed through the extended teenage syndrome of such stressful affairs. But then there’s always someone who explains why this syndrome is dangerous and to be ignored.'

'Do you love your wife?' She asked suddenly.

'Do your parents love each other?' I counter questioned her.

She remained silent for some moments before replying, 'I don't think so. They have issues and I always feel that they lived on compromises. That's why I was eager for a better love in my married life.'

'That's love in marital life,' I replied philosophically. 'Marriage is always a compromise. When the compromise becomes mutual it becomes true love. Thus your parents are enjoying true love and you are after a filmy love that's not available in the real world. My married life is no different. We both know how to compromise and what to compromise. Thus life moves on, lovely!'

She smiled a bit then groaned again. Perhaps she realized her mistake but then felt pains of the accidents she faced during her attempt to commit suicide by jumping in front of our car.

Suddenly a head light of car appeared in Cuttack side of the Bridge. The car stopped near our car briefly but then came towards us. The car carried the girl’s parent. They got out, embraced the girl and started crying.

Rajesh touched my shoulder. He had, in fact, found the girl’s mobile near our car and walked towards Cuttack end to get the signal. Then he called her parent explaining the situation. The parents then rushed back.

The drama of crying and the parent’s thanking us continued for some minutes and after that, the girl and her parents left the scene. Myself and Rajesh walked back to our car. Rajesh looked at me curiously and then asked me, ‘Mr Counselor, who will pay for my damage!’

 I replied calmly, ‘The insurance agency!’

He perhaps used some slang word but I have decided not to listen to that.