The Pit Below My Heart

The reason I wanted to be in a relationship and to have a best friend

Is I was hoping to find someone

Who loved me for me

I was in a relationship to be happy to smile and to feel worth living for

I was in a relationship to make memories with someone other than myself

But instead, I am constantly upset

Feeling hurt

Crying and feeling even more worthless than before you arrive in my life

And because of that, we both drowned under the waves of words we weren't saying

It was like a dagger to my already broken heart

Which resulted in me being unable to share my feelings with any human

Even though I am tired of holding all that pressure inside of me

And a lot of the time I feel like a pressure cooker about to pop

Though I tried so hard to love you with every piece

Of my broken heart, you still didn't appreciate me

And because of that, I haven't felt beautiful in years

Although I might be okay I am not fine or good or even happy

Because every time you're around I suddenly feel this unbearable pain this hate this unhappiness a numbness and it kills me

And every time you're around a piece of my broken heart breaks off and falls into this pit blew my heart

Where I collect all my pain

My deepest thoughts and my sleepless nights

Where I collect "YOU"

-The pit below my heart