Quirky To Savvy!!

Noah’s always struggled with controlling his quirk, and to make matters worse he’s never been very good at hiding what happens when he activates his quirk either. So of course he can hardly keep it a secret from anyone else in the world, especially if they’re looking for him. It’s not that he wants other people to know about this side of himself—it is, but it’s not like he doesn’t have the right to be proud of it or anything. It’s just…he doesn’t know how to handle it yet. The fear that something bad would happen if others found out is still strong enough that he almost considers keeping his quirk hidden forever.

He doesn’t tell Emma about his anxiety issues though—not because Emma won’t understand or because Noah doesn’t trust him, but because that might mean Emma wouldn’t let Noah continue doing her project work, it must feel so much worse to Emma. He hasn’t seen endeavor since they were both kids, but if anyone deserves to know about it then it would be Emma. If he gets the chance he’ll tell him.

Noah is sitting in a coffee shop near his office, trying desperately to distract himself with an article on some new kind of his project agency that’s opening up in Chicago. He’s only half paying attention to the article, but he’s trying to get through it anyway. He's been working on improving his internet reading skills, although he still has trouble at times. He’s not sure why he bothers anymore; he knows he could read it faster if he bothered to listen, but he doesn’t care enough about anything. He can barely remember half of what’s on any given page, and if he focuses too long on one part of the paper he just ends up spacing out and losing focus. He keeps forgetting the words on his own without reading them.

He tries to force himself to read a few pages before realizing he has no idea what they’re talking about. So instead he closes his eyes and takes deep breaths, trying to focus solely on the feeling of his lungs moving. Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. He does it over and over again until he feels calmer and more collected, even if he’s still nowhere near calm enough to concentrate. He’s got to try harder though; he needs to keep going. Maybe if he can get the rest of the article over with sooner then it seems possible that he can just leave.

Just as he thinks that he sees his phone buzz and he nearly jumps out of his skin when he realizes it was there all along. Fearing the worst, he picks it up and glances down at the screen, hoping that somehow everything will be okay. His heart immediately stops beating when he sees the message that appears next to it and he swears softly under his breath.

Emma: Noah, are you ready with your presentation?

His blood runs cold as he reads the question and all he can do is stare at the message, unsure whether to reply. It shouldn’t matter now, should it? They aren’t back at school and it’s probably better that way. He doesn’t want his mates asking questions about him being sick and crying in his room again while they think nothing of it. But if this is really about what happened after the project meeting then Emma wants to check on him, which means that she knows. Shit. This isn’t supposed to happen. He thought he was over this.

He tries to think of something else besides this, but the thoughts are getting tangled in his head and he feels dizzy when he lets his eyes slide closed to try and think clearly. There's just no escaping Emma these days, is there? Noah didn't expect he'd ever see him outside of the meeting room—not unless he wanted to—so the fact that Emma is here talking to him is completely unexpected. And if Emma knew about this, she'd probably ask about it, which meant Noah couldn't exactly dodge the conversation. Not when he knows Emma is waiting for an answer.

So he texts back.

Emma: Answer me? Will you?

Noah couldn't lie about his project rival Mandrick's behavior after the meeting. He blamed him for stealing his project ideas and every piece of information.

The mobile rings again Emma: Why would it matter if something happened between us? We're still friends. I apologize for causing you concern. Go home

Noah: I appreciate your concern. Goodnight.

Emma responds almost instantly.

Emma Noah: Ok, goodnight, Sleep well.

Noah sighs and puts his phone down on the table, rubbing his face tiredly. He hates lying to Emma, he does, but the truth is that the idea of telling Emma what happened in the backyard of the office scares him. At the coffee café, he spotted Mandrick and Emma together. It seems it was happening all over again because it was real. No more lies; no more pretending; he has to deal with the consequences of his actions, consequences he wasn't ready for.

He rubs at his temples, willing the ache to go away. He feels exhausted despite sleeping the entire day. He thought to tell Emma the truth even though he wasn't hundred percent certain that was the best move. He didn't attend the presentation meeting. He was able to escape by saying it was just a headache and that he hadn’t felt well since yesterday and Emma believed him and didn’t press him further. Now that they’ve reached the last hurdle Emma wants to talk to him about this.

But he’s scared. He’s been scared of everything since he met his childhood friend, but this time it’s different. It’s personal, and Noah isn’t prepared to confront this yet. All he knows is that the person that he used to know doesn’t exist anymore. And he has no idea what will happen if they try to rebuild something solid between them. Because he knows that Emma isn’t the type to hold grudges and she’d forgive him easily, even if he knew Noah lied to him.

He sighs and grabs his bag to stand up and head home. He doesn’t need to worry about meetings today; he has plenty of time to think during dinner and maybe take another nap before he works on his project.

—

Noah sits cross-legged on the floor of his bedroom, staring intently at the textbook laid open on his lap. He hasn’t paid attention to anything but this for the past ten minutes. He should tell Emma the truth as he was about to be destroyed by his rival, Mandrick, which could have ruined his entire career. He wasn’t going to tell him about the pain in his chest when the adrenaline wore off, so he said he had a panic attack, which he did, but there’s still no mention of him using his quirk. There's only one thing left to do. Noah informs Emma about Mandrick. Emma looked concerned. So there’s no reason for him to lie now. It was wrong of him to do so anyway. It’s not like he had a choice, he couldn’t hide it from her, and she deserved to know the truth. And besides, even if she wasn’t his girlfriend anymore there's no need to lie to her; it’s not like she doesn't care what happened. She doesn’t hate him. And if she did love him then they would’ve stayed together, right?

After knowing the truth Emma asks her about the project work he created. Noah explained his work very well as if he knew the total idea of the new project, he even had a great sense of knowledge. She was amazed to read the article that inspired his presentation idea. Emma regrets that she trusted Mandrick. Noah doesn’t blame her because he understands what Emma went through, and he’s upset that he didn’t tell the truth earlier. Emma didn't say a word about it. Noah felt Emma never liked her; he should have known that from the very beginning. He was angry at himself for falling in love with someone who never loved him back. Noah leaves the place because he knew Emma would never want to live with her again. His house was too painful, it reminded him far too much of how he once treated his mother. He can’t even begin to imagine the kind of pain it must’ve put Emma through. Emma soon realized her mistake, so she called him as soon as she got home, asking him to stay with him. He needed him, she knew. Ignoring Noah's feelings could have been inconsiderate on her behalf. Noah was desperate and afraid to lose her again. After some hesitation, Noah accepted her offer.

Noah can’t deny that even though he’s weird Emma came home and stayed longer than expected, there’s also a pang of regret that he felt when he saw how sad his friend looked when he walked inside. It seemed like the pain of losing someone close to him was still quite prominent.

Maybe it’s because Emma loved Mandrick.

His stomach turns with envy at the words. He’s done his share of hurting people around him and he didn’t care anymore. He was trying to forget about it, but he’s done a pretty terrible job at it; instead of letting his feelings run free, they’re still present in the corner of his mind every time he remembers that Emma might have felt something for him. If he thought about it, he could’ve made it better for both of them and he’s glad that he didn’t. As long as he keeps those feelings suppressed he will not be able to come out of this. He proposed to Emma. She felt amused and accepted his proposal, she also apologized to him for trusting Mandrick. Noah believed in himself and relied on his instincts to conquer his life's challenges.