Your Best Temporary

It's 1.49 a.m, standing on the balcony alone, starring at stars and moons... 

heart beating slowly but huge of things are running like a race in mind... 

all things from the starting day to till date are coming like one after the other... 

those joyful days, late night talks, noticing each other very minutely, zooming each photo and nothing to do just blushing a little, and behaving like teenagers.... 

however, 

one of the worst feeling is to get myself out from your life but still keeping you in my heart and thinking of you in every single passing second,... 

meanwhile, I miss you, want you, love you, want to cuddle with you, hug you tight, kiss you, but can't tell because the situations are not the same anymore....

you are not the same anymore... 

yes, I know you'll definitely say, "that nothing is happening like that"... 

it's just your wrong mindset, your negative thinking, so stop over thinking... 

but... no... every thing is not okkat all...

it's not my mindset, it's you who forcing me to think so... 

someday when I'll be not there in your life... 

i may say, you are going to miss 

my boring useless talks, 

my silly questions, 

my baseless wishes, 

my fighting for no reason, 

my arguments, 

my mood swings...

and I'll definitely wish that one day you could understand...

my possessiveness, 

my weakness, 

my jealousy, 

and my insecurities for you... 

but most of all you may miss the way I care for you... 

that simple text "have you taken lunch???"

may seems normal and usual to you,

it also makes you irritated most of the time and replying like "is food everything in life??"....

but behind this small text, the great treasure of love was hidden which was never noticed or understand by you... 

when I first met you, honestly saying...

I didn't know you were gonna be this much important to me... 

I was never in need of love... but I don't know how and why this happened to me knowingly or unknowingly???

no matter, how long or short I'm in your life , or what my role is, I'll leave my mark. 

you won't be able to forget me... 

yes, I may not be your permanent but I promise I'll be your best ever temporary.