Dear Dad..

Today I am nothing to you 

Someday I will be 

Someday I will be someone I wish to be

Today u hit me with your words 

Someday you will shower fake love 

I promise I will leave to be someone I wish. 

There are times when I expect a lot

Think about and overthink loud 

Maybe that's the only lack

Don't worry I promise 

I will leave soon 

I will no more be your burden 

I will no more be a broken heart

I will no more hide my tears and fake a smile. 

Today your words hurt 

Because I let them hurt me 

Because I gave you the right to

Because I thought I love you

Or maybe I thought you do too

So much broken broken 

That eyes glitter with tears of pain or hate. 

Because I can't accept that it's you 

It shouldn't have been you. 

I refuse! 

But damages are already done. 

You have spoken and love is all gone 

Tell me why do u have to hurt me 

As if all these years were just a forced bond. 

Am I not your blood 

Now I deserved your sweet words and hug. 

But you have blessed me with your anger and adorned me with a broken heart. 

Congratulations! Today you have done something I never noticed, 

Something I always forget 

Something I always forgive. 

But I promise it will not be so 

At least not any longer now. 

I have got to go away

I have got to go away

I have got to go away from you 

Unless you feel my absence

Unless you sing me back with sadness

But I promise there's no turning back 

Once gone I will forever be gone.

It is so painful, my heart hurts

It's so painful my breaths blocked 

It's so painful and this head feels all heavy with the unwanted burdens I carry. 

It's so fucking painful when your 

blood hurts its very existence. 

It's all so painful to just be you. 

Today I am nothing to you 

Someday I will be 

Someday I will be someone I wish to be 

Today u hit me with your words 

Someday you will shower fake love 

I promise I will leave to be someone I wish to be.