Love In Halves

Since you refused to be with me anymore, I turned myself half into you. Now a part of you resides in me, loving me and another part of me hating you. You always used metaphors to hide your deepest pains and jokes for sincere truths. Ironically, I bad mouth you using the expletives I refrained you from using with tears brimming up like a cascade and a divided heart. Half falls in love with you more and another half pricks a lot in pain.

I was never attracted to you physically but your smile with that not-so-likeable moustache made me go crazy for you. When you would sleep, that baby-like dusky face with silky smooth hair scattered on your forehead would make me snuggle up close to you. I have never played with your hair because I knew how much you loved them. But trust me, if I had done, you would have never felt a hand warmer than mine.

But there was something really special about your arms. Those big ones always ready to wrap me from one side. Till date, no man could make me so comfortable in that space like you did. My head resting on your shoulders and me trying to intertwine my fingers in your big palms, that moment was always so precious. How did I not think of kissing you at that moment?

I remember how I detested the girl who left you heartbroken. How could she dare to hurt you so much? Whenever I read your poems and stories written reminiscing about her, they would make me cry. It had so much pain; I never wanted you to bear so much. Little had I known that I would be writing for you in the same manner, after you left me.

People say they seek love but no one loves them purely. You feared that I might leave you like others too. I promised to be your forever and look I am still yours just forgotten to be mine also. I gave you the selfless pure love, you knew well. I know you have felt it. But maybe, just love isn’t enough. You have to love like solving a jigsaw puzzle, joining only two pieces at a time - a bit of you and a bit of mine. And when the picture is complete, we would have united for forever.

I was so reckless that I kept losing my pieces. How could have I connected with you then? Can’t we join in some other way and make a new picture? I guess not, cause no matter how many times we try, I will always lose my pieces in the way. I have loved you way too much anyway.