The Voracious Love

People around us change their behaviour and, character as a dress. They are never the same. Sometimes they are kind and compassionate, and the next moment they change. They support us, if they share something with them. But they change in our absence.

They are selfish, but show as if they are kind. The People have become actors.

They act as heroes for help. They act as villains when we need their help. Sometimes friends too hit me harder by imagining me by their drum. I'm not a drum, but my silence made them hit me faster. Parents too were not in the situation to accept me. But still 

there is a special one who understands me.

He is crippled. But humanity flows inside him. His smile makes me understand that the smile from the heart is more beautiful than a fake smile. He always supports me, though he is crippled. Through him I could sense that having a pure heart is more beautiful than having good legs. His heart is filled with goodness. He has been so good to me even in burdens. None can replace his smile. 

Do you wanna know his name?

Wait!! Let me share the strength of our bond with you. 

Before that I want you to introduce his name.

He is none other than my brother, Afrose.

His heart too is beautiful as a rose. 

1999.

 My grandfather gifted me a diary. He passed away in the same year. I missed him a lot. I was five years old when I lost him. 

I haven't opened the diary. It was in my shelf.

In the next year Afrose entered into my life.

My English teacher advised me to record daily incidents in the dairy. "It would increase your writing skills", this was her words.

I decided to start this daily routine. 

But I couldn't write.  

In 2005 again I decided to write.

2005

Afrose turned five. Afrose and I studied in the same school. I hold his hands. It was a beautiful moment. Together in the van, laughing and sharing the snacks. Though he struggles to walk, I always supported him.

The other students criticized him. It hurts me. As he is a special child the principal fired him from the school. It made me sad. In our area there is a special school for differently abled kids. So he was sent to this primary school. The teacher taught them reading, adding, subtracting, multiplying. Afrose was kind to his schoolmates. He told me the school was comfortable as well as entertaining. I was happy with it. 

Unexpectedly Afrose was affected by Epilepsy. It destroyed the family. As my father was working in other district mother suffered a lot. I was left under the control of granny. I missed an amazing play mate. I was admitted in the hospital. I couldn't able to meet him too. The hospital was in another state. Through phone calls I enquired him about his health. I talked to him just for a second. I could feel his joyness through the phone. After 8 months, he returned home. I was happy with it. He eats a tablet after the dinner, lunch and breakfast. Even I struggle to have a tablet when fever strikes me. I was saddened by it. 2005 was the darkened period in my life. My brother's too.

2006

Afrose slept many hours. Even mother won't distrub him. In films I have noticed the day girls tying rakhi to the brothers. I too fought with my mom to buy it. Mother refused because we are in southern part of India. I was so adamant. Later she brought it. I was happy to tug it in his hands. He really loved it. I went to school. He didn't removed the rakhi from his hand. I was moved. One week too passed. Later, at the end of the month I forcibly removed it from his hand. As a special child, he had some arrogant behaviour too. It effected me. Afrose was not allowed to attain school. The usage of high dosed tablets affected his behaviour.

I began to hate him. He beats me without any reason. He snatches away my snacks.

You complaints to mom about me. I completely began to reject him. 

2009

My SSLC classes started. My school timings were changed 8. 30 a.m. to 8. 30 p.m. I have no time to converse with Afrose. When he awakes, I won't be there. On weekends Afrose sits near me, but I abused him. It left him sad. On this Rakshabandhan he waited for me with rakhi. I was late from school, the drugs in the medicine made him sleep. I was sad, when mom informed me about this. I went to his bed and tied it in his hands.

2010

Afrose restarted his schooling again. He never addressed me as sister. It killed me. Once he addressed my cousin as sister. It left me in tears. He saw me crying. From that day, he doesn't want to hurt me so he never addressed anyone as sister. It made me understand his love.

2013

I was at college. Still Afrose was studying in same school. He was brought up with kindness and compassion. Once I was late from college. He told me, if my legs are good, I would have come to pick you in the evenings. This words hit me as hammer. I was much worried about him. His future too.

Who will take care of him, after parents die?

How will he earn money? At night, I used to sit near his bed and pray to God for his best future.

2017

I completed my UG. Still he was in same school. My parents were worried about his future. Parents decided to change his school. They wanted him to complete his 12th. Though he was older than others, the principal of the school admitted him. We both became closer as friends. He shared with me everything. I was friendly too. I hide something from my parents too. I kept his secrets safe. I never black miled him. I used to bring sweets from my college canteen for him. I was happy to see him eating it. He was studying 9th. I began to trust God again.

2018

As she was the special child, he approached scribe system. Mother goes to his school and write a monthly and term exams for him.

To his luck, on English and Maths exams sometimes I went to write a exam for him. E had a great time together by smiling and laughing. He completed his SSLC successfully. I too completed my PG. 

2020

Corana puts an end to our dreams. Schools were closed. 2 dreams crushed. Online classes begin. He studied harder. I was searching for a job. But I couldn't find any update from the companies. I started my internship to join the IIT. I was busy too. We celebrated Rakshabandhan without rakhi.

The government declared to pass every students. Finally he completed his schoolings.

2021

I completed my internship. I left home for a job. I stayed in hostel for the first time. My brother didn't talk with me. I began to cry. My mom informed him I was crying. So he contacted me. He told me not to cry. I told him as you never contacted me, I cried. He promised me to call everyday. He encouraged me to eat healthy food. Meanwhile, my brother was in struggle.

If he was in wedding ceremonies the people enquired him about his future studies. It dragged him towards depression. I was angry at those people. They know he was a special child but they hurt him. Finally he has gone to the school he studied earlier. His friends were forty-five years old but they still come to the school run for special kids.

2022

I was happy to bring him the necessary things while I return home from work. Meanwhile I got married. On this Rakshabandhan I reached home with my hubby to put rakhi on my brother's hand.

When I was in pitch, his Love motivated me to reach the pinnacle. Sharing the love through Rakhi seemed good. Our hearts are tied together on this day. My hubby is kind to Afrose. They become friends. They laughed together. I hope in future I will take care of him.

2023

In this Rakshabandhan I was in abroad. I couldn't meet him. But finally talked with Afrose through Videocall. I told him, "I am lucky to have you as my brother. You supported me when I need help. Don't worry about anything. I will be there for you in all times. I will support you when you need a supporting hand. Always be happy 😊"

Thank you for reading my story.