Love Journal

2nd Sept, 2016, 

3:19 pm, 

My hostel, 

"Come soon... I miss you, my dumbo", I made the puppy face during video call with her.

"I'll be there tomorrow dawn. You will have to pick me up from the airport when I call you." As she exactly knows how to appease me.

After five minutes of conversation, we disconnect the call and I went to sleep because I was tired of a very hectic schedule of my dance rehearsals, college, and other stuff. 

At 1 am, 

After finishing our football match in our hostel ground, I went to the canteen of my hostel for some coffee with my roommate Denish and two other friends Arjun and Mihir. We made our coffee and sat on the bench out there, while my phone rang. There was a big smile on my face when I saw the name "Kavya" on the phone screen. I picked up the call and she told me that she will step on the Mumbai airport after 3 hours. After listening to this great news, l was on a cloud of nine that finally after two months she would be here.

My friends caught me when I was screaming out loud "yeyy, she is coming.. She is coming... Finally.." Arjun said that I am mad over her. Mihir told that these guys are made for each other and everyone started teasing me with her name. One of our juniors was sitting there on the bench and listening to everything. Suddenly he asked who is she? Why am I so much in love with her? 

I closed my eyes and recalled eveything. those meetings, those practice sessions, those studies, those long drives, each and every moment that I spent with her in this last two years. From sharing friend request on the facbook to sharing every small detail, we are so close to each other. And I never forget that day when I saw her first time in college. 

18th Oct, 2014, 

1:35 pm, 

Our College, 

After our dance practice when we were chilling, I heard some classical lyrics from the ground where we practiced all the time. I went there and I was amazed when I looked. There was a girl in black top and blue denim jeans with white shoes. She was doing hip hop on classical lyrics. "Woww. She is amazing." I commented with my wide-opened eyes. Her dancing skills were so damn good and she was the girl who could easily excite a person to come on the floor and dance.

"Ahaan..Just look at her. She is so pretty. And her dance. damnn.." Rahul interrupted me when I was lost in her dance. After five minutes of watching her, we went for our practice as we didn't have much time for our competition. At that day we won the dance competition and had a great party till night. Then I came to the hostel and freshened up. I checked my phone when I heard a message tone. 

(There was a friend request on the facebook. I was surprised and shocked at the same time when I saw that girl again. That's her. I saw the name "Kavya Patel" on the screen. I accepted her request and in a minute she messaged me.) 

"Congratulations for today." 

"Thank you," I replied. 

"You're welcome." She texted. 

"By the way, I saw you today dancing at the ground. Your dancing skills are amazing." I messaged. 

"Thank you." Her short and sweet reply came. Then after we had a long conversation about dance routine, college days and other things. We became good friends on that day (actually night.)

Then onwards we met regularly in college. We hungout together. The main and the best thing that brought us close is Dance. We both love that, so we often took part in dance competitions together. After some days I realized that I started falling for her and I really liked her, but I had no guts to say her. Some days passed. All went very good. And then one day I had a fever of 102. After attending lectures, I went to the rest room which was on the 4th floor of our collage. No one knew that I was there. After some time I went to the terrace for some fresh air. I sat in one corner. Suddenly I become frantic and started finding my pills in my beg. (Because I am a patient of depression) I found my pill, and when I was going to take that pill,

"Hey Sam, what are you doing here?" I heard.

I turned up my face to look. There was Kavya. I hide my pill inside my hand. She sat beside me and asked me what happened to me. I become more frantic and told her to leave me but she didn't left. I shouted at her but she didn't move. I didn't care about her and I was going to take my pill. She asked me what was that I didn't give her any answer. She again asked me but I did not utter a single word. She became angry and tried to slap me. At that time I started crying. Yess!!! I cried, and I cried like a little child.

She was shocked. She had never seen this side of me. She wiped my tears with her hands, but my tears.... They didn't even want to stop. I lied my head in her lap and cried a lot. She tried hard to make me calm, and after 45 minutes I finally stopped crying.

That 45 minutes, she didn't ask me anything. She didn't even move from my side. When I felt better, she asked only one question:" What was that, Sam?" Then I started to tell her everything. 

"Actually I'm from Delhi. I was born there. There were only 3 people in my family. Me, my mom, and Dad. They both loved me alot as I was a single child. My mom was a CA, and my dad is an army officer.

When I was 13, my mom went to Bangalore for some work. At that time there was a big dance competition held in Delhi, and I participated in it. Mom told me that she will come soon. I won that competition and when I called her, she told me that she will come home after 2-3 days. At that time I was angry at her and told her to never come home and cut the call. After 3 days I got the news about a plane crash which was coming to Delhi from Bangalore and every single passenger in the plane died. When I heard this, I went into my room and locked myself inside. I broke everything in my room and I cried alot. I cried for 3 days." Kavya consoled me and took my face in her hands and said with a smile, "Everything will be okay."

27th Jan, 2015,

6:35 pm,

My hostel,

My heart was beating fast when I took my phone and turn on the chat of Kavya. I messaged her what I felt about her. There were at least 20 lines of messages. The last line was: "You are my whole world. Would you walk in it with me forever?" My fingers were shaking when I was going to press the send button. My mind was very confused about it that I have to send this to her or not. And finally, I closed my eyes and pressed that send button. Then I kept my phone aside and been busy with my regular stuff. After 20 minutes my phone popped with the answer "NO." I opened the chat and asked her why, but she didn't give me any answers. So I couldn't force her. Next day at the college, she told me that she had a break up just before three months and at that time she was not ready for any relationship, she only wanted to be friends.

10th March 2015,

Our College,

On a normal routine day, there came great news. There was a big couple dance competition held in Pune after 3 years. I and Kavya both were ready for this. After so many late-night practice sessions, we were in the top 4. We both were very excited. But there was a condition that we both had to stay in the hostel for one month at CHARUTHA university. We both agreed with that and after finishing our exams on 28th April, we went there. CHARUTHA university was 45 km away from our city. We stayed there together in one room for the whole month. There were practice sessions for 18-20 hours per day. So we were very busy. One night when our practice was over I went to the terrace for some fresh air. I stood there for some time and when I turned, I found Kavya was sitting in the corner. I went to her and sat beside her.

We were not talking to each other. After 5 minutes of silence:

"You know what Kavya, I will always love you. You are not accepting this but I know you love me too. I can see your love towards me in your eyes. I can see that in your actions. The way you taking care of me, the way you pampering me, the way you scold me for not taking care of myself, the way you understand me, no one will do this same for me that for sure. From you, I learn how to love yourself, how to be yourself, how to control any hard situations, how to behave with anyone around you and many more. Please be with me. I want to learn more from you. I want to give you my all happiness. I want you to be there with me when I have nothing and also want you to be there when I will have everything. I want a lady that represents me and that's you, my girl. For me, you are a perfect girl. I don't want any changes from you. Be the same. And be mine please?" I told her what was ran in my mind at that time. She didn't say anything and went to the room.

21st May, 2015, 

6:30 am,

Hostel of CHARUTHA University,

"I love you, Sam!!" Kavya said.

I was in a deep sleep so I couldn't recognize her and slept again. 

"I love you Sam... " She said it again.

But I was in my dream I didn't even open my eyes.

(And suddenly she slapped me on my face. I awoke and afraid that what happened to her. And what I saw: The whole room was decorated with balloons of heart shape, red and white color of balloons, some sprinkles on that. The small table in the center. There was a pastry on one side and "I ❤ U" from the petals of rose on the other side. That was like a dream to me. I didn't understand what was going on.)

I listened to some music from the corner of my bed, I stood up from my bed and went there. There was a box of heart shape. I opened it and the music went off. I saw a heart-shaped locket in it. I opened the locket, there was my photo on one side and Kavya on the other side. I was so happy at that moment and when I turned back, I found Kavya on her knees. I was shocked. I went to her, she held my hand in her's and told me everything that she felt for me. She couldn't live without me. She told me that she loves me so much and never leave me alone in any situation.

After all this she asked me, "You are my whole world, Would you walk in it with me forever?" I couldn't explain what I felt at that time. Butterflies were flying inside me. I said yes to her. I grabbed her from her waist in my arms and hug her tightly. I was so so so happy that day.. That was the best day of my life. I kissed her on the forehead, on her eyes, on her both chubby cheeks. After that, she put a locket in my neck and she was going to kiss that locket at that time I kissed on her nose. She felt shy and hug me tightly. I screamed out loud "I love you Kavya. You are mine forever. I will never leave you. I will always love you my girl."

And after all this, we won that dance competition too.

P.S.:- If you have your perfect one, never let him or her go. Stick to them. Learn to wait. Maybe you are not meant to be together at that particular time, but in future, you may have them for a lifetime.